It's been a long while since I've written anything on this blog. For the past year or two I just haven't felt like writing. Life is busy and it's easy to send off a quick post to Facebook or snap a pic on my phone and post on Instagram. Life is messy too. Mine has been. For the past couple of years we faced some issues in our marriage like my husbands addiction to alcohol and my codependency, we have had problems with debt and have second guessed decisions we've made. It hasn't been all pretty flowers and cute decorating, so I haven't posted. We're still working through those messy issues and I miss having a place to capture my thoughts. So, here I am. I'm 45 now. I was 39 when I started this blog and so excited about having a place to write and that someone out in the world might actually see it. Now, I'm not too concerned about who reads it. I'm writing for me and I'm ready to be real. I'm in the process of changing the name of this blog to reflect how I've changed. I'm still Blessed. I'm still counting those Blessings. But now, I want to write about me and everything in my life...not just the cute, flowery fluff. (Although, I'm sure there will still be plenty of that here). I honestly believe that everything we go through prepares us for something better. I'm counting on it.
It's August and a time for new beginnings. Looking forward to sharing it here.
Love,
Jackie
I have been wondering about you my friend. In a world of seemingly "perfect" blogs, filled with perfect homes and perfect marriages and perfect kids and perfect recipes and perfect EVERYTHING, it takes amazing courage to actually admit what everyone already knows anyway, that our lives are NOT perfect. Yes, life is messy. I will be praying for you Jackie. For God to show you just how big He really is. To remind you that He is bigger than any situation you can face in your marriage, or your life, and how very much He loves you and your husband and your boys. Many many times I don't understand why things happen. How can we pray for something that just HAS to be God's will, and yet, our prayers don't get answered?? Why would God not answer a prayer for something good?? I still haven't figured that out, but of one thing I am certain . . . Romans 8:38-39 "For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,
ReplyDeletenor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." That my friend is a promise. No matter what we see, or how we feel, Jesus loves us, and He sits at the right hand of God interceding on our behalf. He never leaves us, even when we feel alone. And I don't know why I'm typing this . . . maybe its more for me than for you. My prayers are with you my friend. And, just so you know, I would be honored to pray with you or for you, and I don't need details, God knows before we even ask . . . just shoot me an e-mail anytime). Welcome back :)!
Ah, Robin...this made me cry. I would be honored if you would pray for me. I could really use the prayers. Thank you so much!
DeleteI mean Robbin (:
DeleteThank you for sharing your honesty. I think that we as humans (perhaps especially as Christians, but I'm not sure because I've never been anything but a Christian - maybe Jews and Hindus have the same issues) try to hide our flaws as much as possible, but I think it is only when we are honest about our struggles (not always the sordid details, even - just that we are struggling) that we can reach out and be reached in ways that really matter.
ReplyDeleteMy sister just posted about her own struggles w/ anxiety and depression and she provided a link to a buzzfeed compilation of cartoons about depression (http://www.buzzfeed.com/hnigatu/comics-that-capture-the-frustrations-of-depression). #12, in particular, I think captures what I'm trying to say.
So in that spirit, I'm trying to be more open about my own depression/anxiety issues (especially at church/with church friends) and to reach out to others to let them know that I am willing to pray with/for others in their struggles. And that, of course, includes you.
I think that the old saying about God not giving us more than we can handle is usually missing a very important last few words... "with HIS help..." I believe that we can very easily "not handle" the challenges we are given if we try to handle them alone. It is ONLY with faith, hope and love in Him that we can handle whatever comes (i.e: nothing is impossible w/ God).
So keep looking with an eye of faith toward the God who created and loves us more than we can understand, and best wishes in your ongoing walk in Him.
Last thought: Hebrews 12:1 -> Romans 5:3-5 -> Luke 21:19/ . (let me know if you want more of my thoughts from teaching a lesson on patience last Sunday in church)
Love you, friend. God bless
Thank you for sharing your struggles too, Julina. It's a small comfort to know others struggle as well (even though I don't wish that for anyone). Thank you for your wisdom, my friend.
DeleteJackie
Oh yes, the blogging world of perfect homes, prolific gardens, darling children, handsome husbands, cute pets, clever crafts, yada, yada, YUCK! It can make you so discouraged sometimes that you don't want to blog anymore because you can't possibly keep up with the Virtual Jones's. I hear ya! All I can say is Good. For. You. for figuring out that you need to be true to yourself in order for anyone to truly hear what you are saying/writing. Keep on writing!
ReplyDeleteThank you Marie!
DeleteSo Jackie . . . today you know how you start to do one thing and it leads to another and then you forget what you were really doing. That's me. I was searching my blog about where we had gone once near Moberly camping, and to some antique shops. (Perry Mo is what I was looking for). So I found my old post and there I started reading the comments. There was one from you. Then it got me to thinking, awe, I haven't read your blog for ever.
ReplyDeleteSo there I arrived on your new post. As you know by now, we became FB friends in that timeline somewhere today.
I to don't blog as much as I use to, thanks to FB and instagram too. I originally started it for the grand kids to find out what and when we did something, years down the road. Hopefully they will under life sometimes gets in the way.
I will pray for you and your family. I hope things are getting better for you all.
If by chance you at are home in Shelbina on Friday, keep an eye out for us! or Perry where ever we maybe!
Take care my friend.